« Mars Indecent | Main | Hanging Women »

February 12, 2004

New Nigerian Spammer

Ok, John Kerry's lover flees to Africa, and now I'm getting spammed with crap like this.

Hello & good day, The prompting of this letter is based on my genuine intention to establish a mutual business relationship with you. I got your contact during my search for a credible individual who can be of immense assisstance to my lover, former presidential candidate John Kerry and myself. For proper introduction, I am Miss Alex Polier, the earstwhile staffer for the Kerry campain, a journalist, and former cheerleader and lingerie model. You must have read in the news lately of how the press pressurised presidential candidate John Kerry, due to his confession of war crimes and obvious flip flopping on many issues, to step down and go into exile in Nigeria with his close associates, where I wait in vain for him. In line with this development we decided to set aside some money from his wife’s condiment fotune for safe keeping in western europe to take care of our future when we finally go into exile. For this (myself and Kerry) have the sum of $22.5(twenty two Million, five hundred thousand U.S Dollars) forwarded me $50 million dollars in monies from the Heinz corporation, which is sitting in europe intended for investment. I am soliciting your assistance in taking over the temporary owndership of the funds quickly because of the hunt by the press and his wife to frozen our bank accounts and confiscate our assets. All formalities in respect of your take over will be facilitated by a diplomatic contact in europe from the Kerry campain. We are willing to compensate you with a negotiable and satisfactory percentage of the funds for your coperation and assistance in this regard. If this information appeals to your positive response, do not hesitate to contact me via email address stated above so that further details will be unfolded to you asap. Finally, I sincerely apologise for encroaching into your privacy with this email. Yours faithfully, Alex Polier.

February 12, 2004 in trollSongs | Permalink


TrackBack URL for this entry:

Listed below are links to weblogs that reference New Nigerian Spammer:

» Did a Democrat EVER Meet an Intern He Didn't Want to Fuck? from The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
Every time we think that the Donk Race to Obscurity known also as the "primaries" cannot possibly get any more... [Read More]

Tracked on Feb 12, 2004 10:32:01 PM


Not 'Amber'??? Amber Birkenstocks? 'Ultra-Deep-Tonsils' Amber?

Oh, no... now my hero, Chief Whistleblower of the Winter Soljers Division, will go down (in a manner of speaking) with his honor besmirched and a large damp spot on Amber's chin.

Sad, so sad... itsa sad, sad sitcheeashun...

Posted by: Sharps Shooter at Feb 12, 2004 11:37:21 PM

We should have a John Kerry Nigerian spam contest Sharpshooter. New pleas for help arrive every day!

Posted by: George Turner at Feb 12, 2004 11:44:55 PM

If you will just open your account... -pantpant-
a little wider... -pantgasp!-
Kerry can... -grunt-
make a deposit... -groan-

(yeah, I can see it now, GT...)

Posted by: Sharps Shooter at Feb 13, 2004 12:00:06 AM

She didn't go to Africa. She's right here.


Posted by: GE at Feb 13, 2004 2:39:18 PM

Go to www.419eater.com. You might be able to pick up some helpful hints if you feel like a game of rhinocerous-and-mouse.

Posted by: Bill H at Feb 14, 2004 1:10:12 AM